Which one is bigger? Our fear of failure or our fear to succeed?
This is one of the most impactful coaching questions I ever got and which works wonders with my clients also when it comes to realizing where the root of the matter really is.
Let me share a story to illustrate.
Unexpected chances to propel us forward
The other day I had a belated virtual coffee with a peer who I was in touch with for a collaboration.
Our exchange happened just a couple of days before her event announcing her newest project.
She shared with me that one of her presenters dropped out and she offered me to jump in. She was interested in a different topic though than the one I proposed originally, but one that I was delving into for the past year.
An old pattern getting in the way
Instead of bursting with excitement, suddenly one of my old patters kicked in. I froze in front of the unexpected opportunity and shrank. My whole to do list for the week appeared in front of me and I started to panic how I would pull it off to appear with quality content.
I said I didn't feel I was the credible source just yet to teach this and pulled out.
Different ways to work with our energy
After we hung up, I stopped for a moment. I reconnected to my belief in myself, my why and how this was a test. I checked in with my breathing and some dance moves to feel this in my system and find my way back to myself.
I realized how much knowledge I already accumulated for the topic and that there was no reason for me to doubt myself. I could do it without issues, it was just the time that was a squeeze for this specific event.
Even if this opportunity was gone, I expressed my gratitude for the discussion that motivated me to put it together eventually and that it helped me get excited about the challenge.
Lesson learned?
Dare to say yes even if we don't see in the moment how we are going to make it happen. This is exactly the point! To trust ourselves that we can do it, transform fear into curiosity, let that be the drive.
An additional tip: plan from what you know and leave the rest. Let the challenge and uncertainty unlock parts of you to be discovered.
Just trust the process.
The key is to be aware and observe ourselves
Typically us women we only dare to say yes to something when we are 100% prepared and credible. Job applications are a great example. Men according to statistics apply when they meet 30% of the criteria mentioned while women only do it when there is a complete match.
We also know that growth comes from being uncomfortable.
So the question is:
Where is the fine balance between ditching the comfort zone and venturing out into our learning zone while saying NO to limiting patterns? And all that if possible without reaching the panic zone!
Our goal is not to freeze, but to enjoy new challenges tailor made for us by us!
And what do we need for that?
Self-discovery, reflection, free flow or as I like to imagine it a refreshing paddle in water with a fair amount of challenges but just as much that allows us to enjoy getting tested in our abilities.
Connecting to the feminine can give us support in that. It has this quality of receiving new opportunities with ease, accepting them and giving birth to new project babies through activating our creative life energy.
If this happens to you too and would like to meet yourself and learn practical tips on how to engage with your feminine energy in a conscious manner in times of change, to get you closer to your goals and further away from your fears choosing curiosity instead:
I am delighted to welcome you on my monthly workshop titled "RADIANT FEMININITY WEBINAR: Navigating Change with Feminine Energy: How to Thrive in Transition?"
Register here for our next occasion on Wednesday 13th December 6pm CET:
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